26.12.2019

soft 

fingertips

lips

hips

thighs

eyes

in bed sheets

touch

tongues

lungs

wrists

fists

cheek bones

collar bones

in mind

whisper

ears

mouths

teeth 

underneath

bruises

bed sheets

sun light

and you

22.12.2019

you know

when you have to tap your nails against a hard surface

bite harder

so that your cheeks get stuck in-between

and in the end there’s blood

but its okay

because that’s exactly what it is

curse words in cursive writing

written inbetween my thighs and in the back of your knees

there’s no need to get anxious

or fall in love

accidentally

but for me it happens so naturally

a little too easily

when something just clicks

someone clicks

or stands in the bedroom naked

and i wonder if you get it at all

that i still have my mouth open

heart open

on all fours

only if you ask

for so long that it makes me sick

all of a sudden i can’t remember anything else

other than thighs and shoulders

the back of someones knees

being held up against bedroom walls

cheeks getting stuck inbetween teeth 

biting down harder

i wonder, if its the same for you now

or if it ever has been

have you ever taken the wrong train in the morning

when you just stopped to think

how to get through all of this

because i still need your teeth around my organs

curse words in cursive writing

written inbetween thighs

the back of your knees

as you stand in the bedroom naked

20.12.2019

korjaan jeesusteipillä sun sydänsurut

askartelen silkkipaperista kukkia

ja kiinnitän ne sinitarralla sun poskiin

vesiväreillä maalaan onnea sun silmille

ja sun kielelle asetan piippukrasseista tehtyjä jäätelötötteröitä

voit pureskella niitä sun vahamassahampailla

12.12.2019

i drown in you

fold up flowers

hide them in my pockets

and behind my ears

i see you in the shadows

curtains closed

it was about time

for me to let my hair loose

let the flowers fall from behind my ears

i give pieces of my brains as christmas presents

fold them up too

hide them in peoples minds

leave an imprint

not to be forgotten

i see you in the light

sunshine spilling from the sky

hitting my hair

my ears

making the flowers bloom

letting them replace my brain

and my thoughts

with things that are too pretty to belong there

27.11.2019

i want you 

to place your hands on my mind

hold tight and squeeze

leave a bruise or two

count my heartbeats

i go numb on my knees sometimes

and bruise easily

i want you

to grab my thoughts

lead them the right way

watch them buckle up

and drive me insane

i breathe heavily around fingertips and let them intertwine with mine

i want you 

to make flowers grow in my lungs

plant seeds with your words

and although they are beautiful

i can’t breathe

22.10.2019

standing infront of you

 blush on my cheeks

eyes as green as ever

my skin shivers 

from your fingertips

tiptoeing on my dents

poking my brain

the sun hits my neck

and the bruises on my body

i want to wrap the sheets around myself

stay in them

my heart skips beats

and i count them

your fingertips shiver me

write poetry on me

will you?

2.9.2019

vaaleanpunaiset pikkuhousut jalassa istun   sun edessä 

mulla on jalassa tulppaani ja nilkassa saturnus

pyöritän polvia

annan ihmisille joululahjaksi paloja mun aivoista

sisältä

mutta sulle annoin kaiken

mun ajatukset

koko maailmasta

muuta mulla ei ole

kuin tulppaani jalassa

saturnus nilkassa

ja vaaleanpunaiset pikkuhousut 

jotka jalassa istun sun edessä päänahka auki

23.8.2019

ja mä väännyn ihan vääriin suuntiin ja kulmiin

mutkalle

en tiedä katsoako ylös vai alas

sivulle

vaiko ei ollenkaan

aurinko laskee aina samaan suuntaan 

jos katsoo tarpeeksi kauan

ehkä sokeutuu

pian on jo pimeää

taivun mutkalle pimeässä

ja valoisassa

missä vaan

vaikkei sallittaisikaan

jos niin on hyvä

18.8.2019

life is getting blurrier every day, as the waves hit my cheek harder. if my eyes could spill sunshine the light would hit your face and multiply itself there. letting you see each part of me, letting the waves hit harder. all i wish is to stay here. under your eyes, pressed down. i can barely breathe. fingers wrapping around bruised bodies that have been through too much. as i am bruised, you are too, im sure of that. my knees bend in all the wrong directions and you push my boundaries better than any other. squeezing me into shapes and sizes but most importantly letting me gasp some air inbetween. the waves have been warmer lately, as my mind has been wandering through your neighbourhoods. knocking on doors that dont match with my hand. life is getting blurrier, but im finding my focus in the end and making sure that i, just as much as you too, am alright.

22.7.2019

and we were always just friends

who spoke like lovers

yet i never got to hold your hand

although you always wanted more than that

when speaking wasnt enough

my heart beats faster 

just from the thought of my fingers lingering on your chest

feeling the warmth of your breath on my lips

and yet we still are just friends

maybe not even that

after you started seeking lost souls 

and rebuilding yourself

reminding that im here wasnt enough

because i wont be

not always

not for you

yet i still want to be just friends

who speak like lovers

if thats the only way i can have you

23.2.2019

kynsien alle pureutuu kuollutta ihoa

jalat vetävät metrolle

bussille

kotiin

tai ei ehkä sittenkään

lakanoissa tulee hiki

ja mä kuvittelen jo olevani parantunut

vaikka tosiasia on

että edelleen mietin tarvitsenko iltapalaa

vai pärjäänkö ilman

kun elämän ei tulisi olla vaan pärjäämistä

ilman suakin pärjäisin

mutten halua

polviin tulee mustelmia herkemmin kuin aikoihin

kun raaputtaa reittä

tunkeutuu kynsien alle kuollutta ihoa

jalat kantavat vielä

jaksan ehkä jääkaapille

jos vain tarpeeksi tahdon

ja tahdonhan minä